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Headlines . . . real headlines from the news

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

Clinton Wins On Budget, But More Lies Ahead

Miners Refuse To Work After Death

Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Drunk Gets Nine Months In Violin Case

Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction

War Dims Hope For Peace

New Study Of Obesity Looks For Larger Test Group

Hospitals Are Sued By 7 Foot Doctors

Grandmother of Eight Makes Hole In One

Man Is Fatally Slain

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Autos killing 110 a day, let's resolve to do better

Miners Refuse To Work After Death

Arson Suspect Held In Massachusetts Fire

Juvenile Court To Try Shooting Defendant

Dealers will hear car talk at noon

Stolen Painting Found By Tree

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

Local High School Dropouts Cut In Half

Plane Too Close To Ground, Crash Probe Told

Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers

Include Your Children When Baking Cookies

Iraqi Head Seeks Arms

Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted

Cold Wave Linked To Temperature

Man Tossing Knife In The Air Stabs Himself In Head

Slump in Visitors Leaves Lions and Tigers Hungry
at Chinese Zoo



humor



And here's hilarious set of responses attributed to kids in 6th grade history.


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